ME?

OK- so god has really been working in me! I am in awe of how faithful He is. how He takes time to speak gently to me and teaches me some tough lessons. like this mornings devotional, wow! umm i learned, on a deeper level, how its not about me... not a little bit. Yes God made me and loves me and wants the best for me, but the best He has for me in this life is to glorify HIM- not myself.
" You were made for God, not vice versa, and life is about letting God use you for His purposes, not your using Him for your own purpose."
- The Purpose Driven Life
So many times i would get upset with my life, what is my purpose? Does God even notice how pitiful my life is? Why am I single? Why do people tease me? Why? Why? Why? me, Me, ME!
I am noticing that the reason I get upset and hurt is because things are not going MY way. I say with my mouth I want God's will for my life, but when it comes down to action i expect it to go MY way and for God's will to be my will. I am learning that submission is a lot harder then we religious people say it is. We sing it all the time, pray it all the time, hear it in sermons, it comes out of our mouths so easily "Lord Your will be done, I surrender all", but when it comes time to live it... its not so easy. We speak one way- act another.
"Focusing on ourselves will never reveal our life's purpose"-- The Purpose Driven Life
I need to focus on God and realize I was created and held together for one reason- For the glory of God- not that I may boast in myself or what I have done or accomplished, but what GOD has done and accomplished in me.
"For if Abraham was justified by works, he has something to boast about, but not before God."-Romans 4 :2
I may do all the right things and say all the right things, live the way I feel is best for me and I may boast and others may boast in what i have done too, but compared to God, I have nothing. I cannot boast before a perfect God, because even my "perfect" works show up small and meaningless compared to God.
NOTHING is about me- or about my ways, BUT it is all, 100% about God and His glory!
"I must learn that the purpose of my life belongs to God, not me" - My Utmost for His Highest

"It's not about me, as if You should do things my way, You alone are God and I surrender to Your ways."

Romans 8

In our sufferings we groan (a low, mournful sound uttered in pain or grief). We are aware of the pain we go through and groan through the struggles life brings. . Yet even though we are aware of our surroundings, we ache for something more, we ache for our heavenly bodies, "we know that when these bodies of ours are taken down like tents and folded away, they will be replaced by resurrection bodies in heaven—God-made, not handmade—and we'll never have to relocate our "tents" again. Sometimes we can hardly wait to move—and so we cry out in frustration. Compared to what's coming, living conditions around here seem like a stopover in an unfurnished shack, and we're tired of it! We've been given a glimpse of the real thing, our true home, our resurrection bodies! The Spirit of God whets our appetite by giving us a taste of what's ahead. He puts a little of heaven in our hearts so that we'll never settle for less " 2 Corinthians 5:1-5 (Message) In these times, we may not know how to pray. I know from personal experience, even this morning, my spirit was groaning within me because i was unaware of how to feel or how to express those feelings through prayer. " in the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groaning too deep for words." Romans 8:26 We are humans saved by grace, in our sin we are foolish in the eyes of Christ and in our struggles we show times of weakness, but by the grace of God, by His Spirit, He allows us to stay silent and hears the prayers of the spirit inside us. The Spirit inside of us groans for God and cries out to Him, with cries so deep words cannot be uttered. I know i have felt that deep pit in my stomach, the feeling you can not describe... now I am aware it is the Spirit inside me interceding on my behalf.
" for who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the spirit of the man which is in him? Even so the thoughts of God no one knows excepts the Spirit of God. Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, so that we may know the things freely given to us by God." 1 Corinthians 2:11-12 The Spirit is like a middle man, He knows our thoughts, our desires, our struggles, our heavenly longings, and He also knows the thoughts of God, His desires for us, and longs for us to be close to Him and reunited with Him; this allows the Spirit to intercede on our behalf to God, and for Him to teach us the things of God.
all we need to do is ask and we shall receive for the thoughts of God are freely given to us.
"He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things?" Romans 8:32 Jesus Christ, the Son of God, was the ultimate gift, so if God gave us His Son, His only beloved Son, why wouldn't He freely give us "all things"
?“Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened. You parents—if your children ask for a loaf of bread, do you give them a stone instead? Or if they ask for a fish, do you give them a snake? Of course not! So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him." Matt 7:7-11
God wants to freely give to us the things to equip us for His good work, He wants to bless us beyond our own needs. He offered His Son to free us, to set us free from the bondage we were tangled in. He rescued us even when we ran after our own desires. He brings us to Himself and wraps us in His faithful arms. "So, what do you think? With God on our side like this, how can we lose? If God didn't hesitate to put everything on the line for us, embracing our condition and exposing himself to the worst by sending his own Son, is there anything else he wouldn't gladly and freely do for us? And who would dare tangle with God by messing with one of God's chosen? Who would dare even to point a finger? The One who died for us—who was raised to life for us!—is in the presence of God at this very moment sticking up for us. Do you think anyone is going to be able to drive a wedge between us and Christ's love for us? There is no way! Not trouble, not hard times, not hatred, not hunger, not homelessness, not bullying threats, not backstabbing, not even the worst sins listed in Scripture:
They kill us in cold blood because they hate you.
We're sitting ducks; they pick us off one by one.
None of this fazes us because Jesus loves us. I'm absolutely convinced that nothing—nothing living or dead, angelic or demonic, today or tomorrow, high or low, thinkable or unthinkable—absolutely nothing can get between us and God's love because of the way that Jesus our Master has embraced us." Romans 8: 31-39 (Message) Nothing can separate me, can separate you, can separate us from God's love! From His arms! He is and will always be by our side, and the Spirit will never give up interceding for us! "So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you.” Deuteronomy 31:6

let's give this blog thing a try

I believe the last time I have blogged was when I was in high school.
So this shall be interesting.

I would like to point out that this is going to be used as a semi-daily, semi-weekly or monthly blog... not really good at keepin a habit of stuff. ya know?

anywhoo. (get use to the phrase....I get scatter brained and that is my way of "refocusing")

today was a bit productive - had to come up with a drama for a mission's trip... got the music, now to let the creative juices flow....
so basically I should be doing that right about now...but this called to me...and so here i am typing on the computer to post my random thoughts for the world wide web to creep into my life. sigh....isnt life interesting.
how we have our goals and get side tracked with the pettiness of life.

I wish i would be more goal driven and focused. and then maybe my apartment would be clean, bills would be payed and meals would be cooked....
but right now...
apartment is a mess- bills ha, and fast food is the way to go...or a quick ice coffee... or skip the meals and buy that cute top that i NEED to have...


welll... i really should go and figure out this drama...
till next time.

goals- focus